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A New Low for Cameron

October 6, 2011

I watched Cameron’s speech at the close of the Conservative Party conference, yesterday. We all know he talks a good game and he did not disappoint. He stood there at the end of his show, like a Messiah, descended from his penthouse apartment to deliver us all.

Unless you can feed the country with a loaf and two fishes, put your hands down.

If I had been on an expedition to the South Pole for the last few years and returned today to catch his speech, I would be justified in thinking that these were the most prosperous, the most harmonious, the most positive times this country had ever experienced. I would certainly be surprised to find out that a month ago there were riots across the country, that prison population and unemployment were reaching highs we have not experienced for decades and that the economy has ground to a halt under the incompetent stewardship of this illegitimate government.

But I shall not waste my time with the pile of horse-manure that was his dishonest speech. They say, a picture is worth a thousand words and I found myself fascinated by some of the pictures. The camera often drifted onto Samantha Cameron – as their PR people would have expected it to – especially during the “softer” sections of his speech. Whenever adoption, children’s wards, babies dying in Africa, gay marriage were mentioned – up popped the lovely Sam, again and again.

And look, who is this friendly black chap to her right?

Samantha beautifully framed

A lovely Asian-looking woman sitting just behind her.

Samantha beautifully framed

Would you believe it? Here is an older-looking black lady in the background.

Samantha beautifully framed

And a handsome suited black gentleman on her left side.

Samantha beautifully framed

Now, now! I know what you’re thinking, but how could you be so jaded as to think these people were carefully arranged? I bet you the Tories have genuinely diversified. I bet you this entire hall was packed with ethnic minorities.

Not here

Nor here

Still nothing


And there you have it. Everything you need to know about the cynical, manipulative, contemptuous, misanthropic machine that is the Conservative Party with little need for words.

Believe nothing they say. Instead, open your eyes and look for yourself.

NB: All images are screen captures from the BBC broadcast with no intention of breaching copyright.
32 Comments leave one →
  1. October 6, 2011 3:58 pm


  2. Spencer Allnatt permalink
    October 6, 2011 4:10 pm

    Thankyou when I read your blog I am relieved that someone out there has the wit and energy to lampoon Cameron and his forty thieves I can no longer even watch the ugly braying of the tory Party conference without a large stainless steele bucket to hand.

  3. nick james permalink
    October 6, 2011 4:10 pm

    How could you be so cynical, you naughty boy?

  4. October 6, 2011 4:32 pm

    Excellent work! What a bunch of reptiles the Tories are.

    • FinanceMonger permalink
      October 6, 2011 7:20 pm

      A truly disgraceful statement. Reptiles across the globe will be hanging their heads in shame at the thought they are compared to this venal self interested and dishonest individual.

  5. October 6, 2011 4:51 pm

    Once again I’m humbled by just how clever and effective your blogging is.

    There seem to have been 3 ethnic minorities in the room, and lo and behold they were all sitting next to Mrs Cameron. They even seemed to move her or them around, so that we could definitely see all of them.

    Add to that the almost Churchillian, ‘we shall fight them on the beaches’ speech, where we are all beseeched to ‘pull together for the sake of Britain’ and ‘we shall be great again’. bollocks. ‘It’s not the dog in the fight, it’s the fight in the dog’…bloody hell, where did he get that from?

    Well my answer to that is ‘it both the shite in the politician and… yes, you guessed it, the politician in the shite.’

    Mr Cameron: as a Scot I shall be working hard to ensure that my fellow countrymen vote “yes” in the forthcoming referendum, and leave you and your bulldog spirit to get on with being great. We will settle for feeding our poor and heating the homes of our elderly.

  6. October 6, 2011 5:15 pm

    Well spotted! There’s just one thing I don’t get – your use of the term “illegitimate”.

    The Conservatives got the largest number of votes in 2010, but not a majority. They could have formed a minority government, a coalition with the Lib Dems, or the Lib Dems could have tried the “rainbow coalition” with Labour and smaller parties. All are legitimate, as they are possible and legal, although one could make an argument that the last one would be less legitimate than the others (I suppose it could be argued either way).

    Much as I’d rather never see the Conservatives in power ever again, I don’t think the current administration can be described as illegitimate.

    True, the coalition agreement includes some things that weren’t in the parties’ manifestos, but all governments introduce legislation that hasn’t been voted on by the public – I suppose the idea is that Parliament is a counterbalance. Anyway, I don’t see this administration being any different to previous ones – it’s just easier to see the process of compromise and creativity because its members come from different parties.

    • October 12, 2011 7:48 am

      I interpreted the use of the word “illigitimate” as a more polite way of calling the government a shower of bastards.

      Perhaps Alex could clarify for us?

  7. rogerglewis permalink
    October 6, 2011 5:17 pm

    Oh Dear Oh Dear. Priceless !

  8. October 6, 2011 5:52 pm

    And a nice bright red frock for Sam so she’s easy to find in the crowd. Well spotted.

  9. Grayling permalink
    October 6, 2011 7:11 pm

    thought they’d rather have these people put on the first plane by G4S at Man Apt not sat next to Sam Cam ?

  10. Superbass100 permalink
    October 6, 2011 7:23 pm

    Your blogs are like buses at the moment, but, well worth the wait … what did he actually say yesterday? yeah we want business to prosper and continue paying your debts nothing new ‘same old, same old’ … as for this government being illegitimate … if 2 companies that offered different services decided to merge and told the customers the new service would do x, y and z, but did instead delivered a, b & c you as a consumer would not be happy … too right. So, ask the people who thought the NI increase was being scrapped, ‘Labours Jobs Tax’ if I remember rightly, the schools how much has been cut from there budgets, by central government and replaced with a tiny, in comparison ‘Pupil Premium’ or the Hospital that had it budget increased supposedly ‘in real terms’, but, is part of a £20bn effiency drive, the local council that has had 25% cut, but, has to make up the shortfall in the education cuts, the Police service that has had 20% cut, but, has to have more officers ‘on the beat’ the courts that have closed up and down the length of the country, county and Magistrates … I would say that made this government illegitimate, especially when the ultimate aim was to reduce borrowing, well that worked then !

  11. October 6, 2011 8:09 pm

    Ooo – You ARE good. Never disappoints.

  12. Cyberdunk permalink
    October 6, 2011 8:32 pm

    I didn’t see many ethnic minorities at the labour conference either. Does that make them racist as well as useless? So to please the delusional liberals we have to pack the hall with people of a certain race and creed. Is that not in it’s self discrimination? What a bunch of pointless losers you lot really are!

  13. October 6, 2011 10:24 pm


  14. October 7, 2011 7:27 am

    Where the hell is the gunman on a grassy knoll when you need him?

  15. Enfrance permalink
    October 7, 2011 8:11 am

    Cyberdunk, if its the ‘delusional liberals’ who insisted that the ethnic people were there presumably not a single one would have been there if your Tories had made the choice.

    Interesting to hear that a Tory like you believes that the Liberals can influence the Conservative Party Conference – looks like you’ve lost the plot.

  16. KrustyAllslopp permalink
    October 7, 2011 9:44 am

    Haha! I bet that’s the nearest Samantha Camoron has been to more than 1 Black Person in her entire life….

    What scares me is the projection behind Camoron’s shiny bonce, all that lovely-jubbly Blue-Sky thinking…. Yup, they are officially revolting.

  17. Dennis @brit_newsman permalink
    October 7, 2011 12:02 pm

    Brilliant piece. Never disappoints

  18. Domalom permalink
    October 7, 2011 9:40 pm

    There is an Asian lady in the last photo and I think I see Baroness Warsi somewhere too. Truly this is the Modern Tory Party

  19. Jamie permalink
    October 8, 2011 11:00 am

    This week’s QE has shown Emperor Osborne’s austerity program to be a malignant deception foisted on a country that was too gullible to question the economics.

    Monetary policy such as QE will have no effect at all on demand or growth. As we are still in a liquidity trap it is the proverbial “pushing on a string”.

    The problem with the economy is not a shortage of money – there is plenty of money floating around out there. Money is just not been circulated because of Osborne’s unnecessary and ideological public sector cuts.

    The huge level of fiscal tightening from the public sector cuts and tax rises has caused crushing inequality, lack of confidence and has sucked all levels of demand out of the economy. Households have been made unemployed, there real terms incomes have fallen and even those with spare money at the end of the month are frightened of spending.

    The lack of consumer demand means private sector firms are not increasing production or investing. Why bother to hire new people or increase production if there is nobody buying your goods?

    This is the liquidity trap – the paradox of thrift – the same pattern we saw in the 1930s and in the lost decade in Japan. It is chilling to watch.

    In Alastair Darlings last 12 months the economy grew by. 2.9%, the public sector deficit was decreasing and unemployment falling. This was due to the VAT cuts and maintenance of public sector spending.

    Osborne has withdrawn many multiples of £120 billion from the economy with his cuts.

    This has caused demand and consumption to tank. The deficit is now increasing due to lower tax revenue and higher costs of unemployment. The economy has of course flat lined with zero growth in the last 9 months.

    The Bank of England has now tried to rebalance the £120 billion taken out by Osborne’s cuts with a new QE programme – effectively pushing £75 billion to the banks in return for which they surrender to the Bank a huge slice of the outstanding government gilts. The Bank now bought up a third (£200 rising to £275 billion worth) of the Governments debt.

    Predictably the banks will spend this on bonuses and dividends and speculation in the futures markets. This speculation will lead to inflated oil, food and commodity prices. Not one bean will end up in the real economy stimulating demand. If the economy needs monetary stimulus this should be done with fiscal expansion – as we know loosening monetary policy by giving money to the banks will have no positive effects whatsoever.

    We’ve been there and tried that. We gave them £200 billion in 2009 and they just gambled it away.

    What should be done instead? Fiscal loosening rather than monetary loosening would be effective. It would get money into the real economy where it could act to increase demand. £75 billion should be created by the Bank of England using QE and this money should be used to reverse the VAT rises, tuition fee increases, benefit cuts, public sector cuts etc. This money would flow into the real economy and stimulate growth.

    In terms of debt dynamics, the QE shows the cuts are purely ideological. The Bank of England can obviously create money from thin air without creating a parallel debt anywhere else and this money could be used to clear Government debt.

    Already we have a situation where over a third of the outstanding National debt is sitting in the Government owned Bank and another section of the Government, the Debt Management Office – an arm of HMT – is paying interest to the Bank which is again just sitting there unused. It would be more honest to monetize this debt and just retire it.

    Despite the lies Cameron and Osborne have been feeding us for two years, the Governments debts are not like household debts and can be cleared as and when needed. Governments don’t raise taxes to clear their debts. They raise taxes to take money out of circulation and calm inflation. As we can see whenever it wants the Government can clear the National debt at a press of the button.

    It is outrageous that the Tories have got away with telling this huge lie. It is outrageous that they continue with the cuts when it is obvious this is what has trashed the economy and that it is completely unnecessary. Cutting just to clear a notional government debt is ridiculous. The debts can be either ignored or wiped out whenever we want.

    Take a look at Government debt over the last 100 years-

    Government debt is currently low by historical standards. We have been in debt for each and every year since records began 300 years ago. It matters not a jot. The Government has to go into debt when the private sector is deleveraging or else, as we see now, the economy collapses.

    Read some MMT to understand more-

    • jamie permalink
      October 12, 2011 11:39 pm

      Let me try and put this more simply.

      The government has two levers it can pull to drive growth. Fiscal or Monetary.

      The Tories are denying themselves use of any fiscal levers. They say the reason this is denied is due to the outstanding level of government debt.

      Leaving aside the truism that austerity measures by definition, through the effect on confidence and for monetary reasons are making things much, much worse- sucking demand out of the economy like water through a sieve. It isn’t even working under its own frame or reference- government spending is increasing rather than shrinking as despite cutting spending on useful public sector functions more money is flying out the door from lack of growth, lost tax revenue and higher spending on automatic stabilisers.

      That leaves monetary policy. interest rates are on the floor at 0.5% so can’t go any lower.

      That leaves QE.

      The Government owes shy of £900 billion.

      Sitting in the Asset Protection Facility- a wholly owned by the Government subsidiary of the Bank of England is over £200 billion of the outstanding government debt. The APF bought up this debt in 2009 using QE- money created from nothing using the Bank of England’s powers to credit reserve accounts at will.

      This £200 billion debt can be destroyed in a blink of an eye by the Bank just ripping the gilts up. Nothing more, nothing less. No effect on anything anywhere else except the Governments outstanding debt levels.

      Instead the other option is for the Bank to try and sell this debt back into the market at some point in the future before the gilts mature, expire and cease to have any effects. The crazy, crazy thing here will be that the gilts will be sold back to the private banks and pension funds who sold them to the Bank in the first place and the Bank will receive cash from those who buy them. It will simply then rip up the cash it has been given.

      This is absolute, absolute madness. Which path would you like to see the Government order the Bank to take?

      Alex- can you please do your magic on this issue!!????

  20. Jamie permalink
    October 8, 2011 12:31 pm

    Welcome back Alex

    Really cheers me up to see your eloquent , incisice words. Keep it up, dude!

  21. geoff permalink
    October 8, 2011 3:24 pm

    i hate their faces

  22. Chris Jackson permalink
    October 9, 2011 11:01 pm

    Beautiful stuff Sir Alex. As an ethnic minority myself, I’m glad to read that someone else sees what I see, but also has the wit to go one step further and highlight it in such an eloquent fashion.

  23. October 10, 2011 1:07 pm

    Nice one Sturdy. It never ceases to amaze me how enormously naive politicians are in thinking they can spend vast sums on their publicity machinery, complete with expensive PR ‘cogs’, manipulative press men and fool an intelligent and informed public. How annoyingly patronising they are!

  24. blackwatertown permalink
    October 11, 2011 12:41 pm

    Very clever. Very good. (And very glossy too.)
    Excellent observation.

  25. October 12, 2011 7:49 am

    Now Sarah can also say with conviction “I met a black man once…”

  26. Tim permalink
    October 13, 2011 8:25 am

    Wonderful! Glad you’re back!

  27. Tim permalink
    October 13, 2011 8:27 am

    And I hate to be a pedant, but the handsome suited black gentleman in the fourth SamCam frame is to her right…

  28. Ningaloo permalink
    October 14, 2011 8:51 pm

    I like playing ‘spot the black face’ at Tory conferences – it’s like Where’s Wally (only harder).

  29. October 17, 2011 2:35 pm

    Well spotted, sir!! Good article.

    I can, however, also confirm that the “ethnics” who appear in the clips are actually CGI inserts, using the same software as in the recent animated classic “Avatar”

    The same three constructs have also been used, to great demographic effect, on Question Time, the Lib-Dem Conference, and on recent episodes of Ant & Dec’s Saturday night brain-melt extravagazas


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